Last night, during a conversation with some moms and dads, the topic turned to education and how "parents these days just don't care." Naturally, I had to jump in to dispel some of the commonplace notions about parent involvement. Sadly, various organizations have manufactured this cliche mantra about parent involvement. And this oft-repeated, never-analyzed cliche usually suggests that low-income students are failing because their low-income families aren't involved or, more harshly, don't care. This simply is not true. Obviously there are your outliers, but a lone wolf does not a pack make. The larger picture is much more nuanced.
First, every parent cares about their child's success in school and in life. To suggest otherwise is to misunderstand the scope and depth of human love - the instinct to care for and raise a child. Yes, even low-income moms and dads love their kids! It's important to be explicit about this, because while it may seem common sense, blame games about parents' caring/not caring have an implicit claim about love and care.
Second, parent involvement is about available resources. If, as a child, you were not read to or if you didn't have reading materials circulating throughout your house or otherwise didn't see or experience the tools of the learned, then as a parent you don't have that model to imitate. You don't have that experience as a resource. Or, if you're working full time (maybe more than one job!), then you don't have the resource of time. You don't have time to read the latest book or education articles. This is a resource. Or maybe you are not a teacher (alert: just as most people aren't doctors or bankers or masons, most people aren't teachers and don't have an education background!). This, too, is a resource. If as a parent we don't know or don't have time to engage in learning activities within the home, that is a resource deficiency, not a love deficiency.
Third, 21st century educational realities are much different than what we experienced when we were in school (I can say "we" because this applies to anybody who wasn't in school just 10 short years ago). The amount of information that kids are exposed to, the breakthroughs in learning research, the explosion of available technological tools: all these and more represent breakthroughs in the science of teaching and learning that no parent can expect to have mastered. Part of what this means is that teaching and learning appear to be more complex and not as easily accessible for parents. A perception (dare I say myth?) is starting to surround educational delivery methods. Which is to say, sometimes we take for granted that sitting on the porch with the paper or laying in bed with a book with our child is a formative learning experience. These types (and more!) of "lo-tech" teaching/learning moments still matter. A LOT!
There is yet more nuance to this topic (e.g. issues of human capital, education policy, etc.). But the main point, here, is that to suggest parents who are not involved in their child's cognitive development don't care is grossly uninformed. For those parents who aren't involved - and we'll do well to remember that fewer than 45% of parents read to their kids & fewer than 28% of parents tell their kids stories - it has more to do with access to resources. Parents need to be better supported. There are easy solutions to this. And if as a society we are serious about reforming education, we must reform the way we think about parent involvement. We *must* reform the way we support our parents.
